OVER 55? DREAMING ABOUT FITNESS?
I introduced the first new Kitchen Olympics event just recently.
BLISTER PACK TABLET PROJECTILES
This is the second and I know you are going to enjoy this one.
Presenting……..
COS LETTUCE KICKS!
This is the newest and will become the most popular very quickly, in my humble opinion.
WHAT MAKES A HIGH-PERFORMANCE COS LETTUCE KICK?
The judges have agreed that:
- points will be awarded for the suddenness of the cos appearing
- the height from which it falls
- the connection of the competitor’s foot with the hapless vegetable
- the follow-through of leg actions
- the distance the lettuce travels.
CURRENT WORLD RECORD HOLDER
I proudly hold the current world record for the distance a cos lettuce head can be kicked when falling out of a packet being removed from the fridge.
There were bonus points for the leaves to land like confetti.
It landed 2 cm (0.787″) from the cat’s feeding bowl that was in use at the time.
For those interested in the purpose behind the kick; it was to stop the cos from hitting the floor, of course.
THE FUTURE OF COS LETTUCE KICKING?
I am sure there is a group of competitors getting themselves prepped for this important sport.
You may all be champions in your own right in kitchens across the world.
I am seeking sponsorship from Woolworths for this new and emerging sports trend.
For the very affordable cost of AUD$3, there is a ready replacement if your first cos heart starts to show signs of wear during training.
We can kick those hearts all over the kitchen without warning or prep.
Increasing our hip flexibility and ankle mobility with very little effort and right in the comfort of our kitchens!
ANYONE CAN PLAY – EVERYONE IS WELCOME.
Cats are unlikely to join in – well mine won’t.
Dogs may enjoy the fetch aspect but measurements will need to be made very quickly if you want to record your personal bests (PB).
Boomers probably have a head start on suitability given their life experience and occasionally creaky knees and hips.
Please send word when your cos kicking heats are starting in your neighbourhoods and kitchens.
Every event that we can bring to a wider audience will attract the attention of ………..someone.
GET YOUR COS HEARTS READY!!!!!!
Oh my goodness, Frances! You are hilarious! Love how you took an everyday experience in the kitchen and made it into a sport. Hahaha! Gosh, I haven’t heard the store, Woolworth’s in forever. Now I can get on with my day thinking about lettuce kicking. Now how funny would it have been if you had gotten this recorded?
I am glad you enjoyed it Aletha! I have a small Kitchen Olympics BLOG series planned – so there is more to come! My physical ‘prowess’ is a life long experience. Once again – thank you.
I can picture that happening as you share, cracks me up because that is something that would totally happen to me!
Thank you Jyll for your kind words. I want my words to paint pictures and this one resonates well with you. The Kitchen Olympics squad is always open to people like ‘us’. We train every day.
Does the size matter, or are they all uniform size already? Regulation size maybe? Any degree of difficulted added for kicking one that is already used?
Thanks for starting my day with ideas that may possibly annoy my wife!
Thanks Paul, the size is reasonably uniform I guess but I am open to hearing from a sponsor/grocer who can perfect the aerodynamics of cos lettuce for kicking. Once you have assured your wife of the legitimacy of this new sport, I look forward to hearing your assessment of the flight trajectories of the used heads in terms of ‘lift and land’ capacity. Can’t wait to hear from you.
I head to google COS lettuce! What a dummy, eh? We love it in our kitchen so there won’t be any kicking of it. The dog will catch and eat it before it will land on the floor. 🙂 A refreshing post.
Lily
Thank you Lily. Google is my friend forever. It came into being late in life (yes I am old) and I just love it – no dummies here. Your dog would be a welcome addition to the team!
There still are Woolworths in Australia? Who knew!
I will wait until the World Series to start watching the competition 🙂
Hello there Roy, yes Woolies and Coles are the two major grocery chains here in OZ. The World Series is a way off yet, but we are all champions in our own kitchens! Get started any day that you have a salad for lunch! Thank you for opening my eyes to the world stage for my humble Kitchen Olympics!
North America seems to have recurring problems with contaminated lettuce. At those times the best use of the lettuce is to kick it about. Have you experimented with those that somehow get frozen?
Hey there Doug. What a great use for contaminated produce! Well, hmmmm…. the frozen leaves would have much less lift and travel capacity, wouldn’t they? At least for the top-level competition. Maybe the limp/frozen ones could be used as form practice? Trying to remove the leaves that are clinging to your ankle/foot would be great endurance training – particularly on one leg. Thank you for your refinement in training regimes.